Everything has a point where it can no longer stand some type of force that it finally breaks…
Glass will break above 60 pounds of force. Steel is tougher and can withstand up to 40,000 pounds of force, and the bones in our body can actually withstand more than steel taking on up to 4,000 newtons of force to break the femur for just an example.
Psychology would say that our breaking point would come after dealing with tension and stress until the strain of it is more than we are able to handle.
The last post I wrote I shared about the work out, and how much I endured to reach some personal goals. I woke up 6:15am four or five times a week and met my friend up at the gym. I was excited to look in the mirror and see the inches dwindle away on my hips, face and legs. I was eating properly, and I became pretty comfortable with sweating and then going home and making my full protein and carb breakfast. It came to a point where people were asking my advice on how I lost so much weight and how I was able to work out so often…and I would give them advice, but it was mostly, ” Just kick your own butt on the elliptical for at least 30 minutes and then get into working out with the weights..”
Little did I know, my daily routine was about to change…
I went on vacation to the Georgia mountains with family. It felt so good to be able to know I had the muscles to do hiking and anything strenuous. Even tubing and hitting the rocks in the rapids was not too big of an issue, I knew I could handle it.
Later one evening, I was getting ready for bed, and decided to walk across the loft to tell my mom something who was in kitchen downstairs. I took one step across, and had forgotten that there was step going down into the loft and I fell. I don’t remember much about how I landed but that I was on my left side and I was in excruciating amount of pain. I managed to get to my bed, and saw my left foot was swelling and started to resemble a mushroom. We did not have ice inside the cabin as there was only well water, so I managed the pain with aspirin and told my family that it was pointless to find an ER this high up in mountains so I would wait until we returned to Florida. (Yes, I know I sound insane, but I knew I could make myself endure until I got to my doctor.)
As we drove home, so many thoughts went through my mind, but mostly I wondered how I would be able to keep up with the workouts if I was unable to walk, and also how could I search for my new home if I could only hobble in and out of places.
The next day it was confirmed with the X-ray, I had broken my metatarsal bones in four places and would need surgery. September 11th, I had the surgery, and have now been in bed 15 days only able to go to restroom or to doctor. I am not able to go to work, and not able to even get to church because not elevating my foot will make it swell horribly.
I have not been able to exercise now for a month, and recovery fully I was told will take 12 weeks.
I want to share that it is extremely easy to be discouraged, it is extremely easy to eat junk food all day and act like it doesn’t matter anyway, it is easy to feel bad for myself that this had fully ruined my future plans….and I have had these thoughts.
I was praying to the Lord in all of this though, believe me, He heard the whining, but something was pressed upon my heart one day that I believe came from Him.
” Stop placing your faith in the unseen and place your faith in the One who can see it for you.”
I sat back and thought about it. Everyone has had their thoughts on how long my recovery will be. Everyone has told me their own stories, one person stating I would be good after two weeks….and all it did was discourage me.
If we put faith in the timeline that has not happened yet, of course we will be discouraged, it leaves room for doubt, it leaves room for failures, it leaves room to bring ourselves down so much that we lose our passions, and our goals.
But if we place our faith in God, and His plan and His promises then that discouragement will not take root and turn to bitterness, that doubt will not take root and turn into unbelief, that feeling of failing will not take root and turn into loss of identity, and if we place our faith in God’s plan, our passion and goals will only grow because we become expectant and we become secure in knowing God knows exactly what should happen and needs to happen.
I cannot say I am thrilled at the idea of being stuck in bed, but I do know God knew it would happen, and I will rest and I will take care of my broken bone so it heals properly, and I will keep myself occupied with Bible study; I have a few that have come in the mail; Reading novels, writing letters to friends, watching movies, and I even bought Sega Genesis so I knew how to play video games.
But the bottom line here, it is just important to stay focused, there is a goal here, and there are goals beyond that after I recover. It is just a minor setback but God knows exactly how it all will work out perfectly. We all have a breaking point, but it is up to us if we break.
” Lord, you have assigned me my portion and my cup, you make my lot secure, the boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places, surely I have a delightful inheritance.” (Psalm 16: 5-6)